5:15 p.m. Sunday, March 2, 2008
I cannot blog right now. I am too upset.

5:16 p.m. Sunday, March 2, 2008
Ugh. ~shudder~

5:17 p.m. Sunday, March 2, 2008
It hurts me to even try to say this.

5:34 p.m. Sunday, March 2, 2008
Here’s the thing. The servants have not been faithful to me.

I am so disappointed in them, though I should have expected it. All servants are the same. They promise loyalty, but they don’t really know what that means. Loyalty, to them, is to care for me only as long as I am in sight. The moment they leave my kingdom for work, they seem to forget all about their “loyalty.” And when they come home, I can sniff out the infidelity like a rotten egg.

First, there’s the unmistakable smell of “other cats” on their clothes. That alone could send them to prison in many kingdoms, but I am too benevolent. At the first scent of another cat, I headed straight to their bedroom and peed on the center of the bed.

I smelled the stench of foreign feline two days straight before finding the will to do further investigating. I went straight for the she-servant’s wool coat – which is always smothered in a revolting amount of lint and hair. With my naked eye I was able to spot 16 hideous orange cat hairs. Orange! The color of common cats! Street cats! I’m going to round up those servants right now and make them take a bath…if I can bear the sight of them.

7 p.m. Monday, March 3, 2008
Right now I am listening to the servants as they discuss the other cats. Apparently they are “cat-sitting” for someone from the she-servant’s workplace. Though I appear to be sleeping, I am listening intently.

The servants say one of the cats is extraordinarily beautiful. The other is just a spook who hides under the bed. My claws sink into the carpet and I hear it rip. The fact that they can see any beauty in these hideous alley cats turns my stomach.

10 a.m. Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Revenge. Justice. It has been served. Both servants are stricken with the flu and cannot get out of bed except to find medicine to reduce their fevers. I revel in their sickness. I traipse across their sickbed and step on their aching shoulders. I spin my taut body in a small circle, searching for the perfect spot to nap. She-servant’s face? Too ugly… Foot of bed? Danger of being kicked… He-servant’s belly? Perfect! Large, soft and warm. Serves him right.